Trusting

“That is why I am suffering as I am. Yet this is no cause for shame, because I know whom I have believed, and am convinced that he is able to guard what I have entrusted to him until that day.” 2 Timothy 1:12, (NIV)

It has been an interesting time for me. As many of you know, my book was released on Amazon, and while I was absolutely thrilled to have it in my hands, I was overwhelmed by the presence of it. I knew it was going to arrive in June and asked some very special people to join me as I opened the box. However, when I saw it on my doorstep, there was no way I could wait for them to arrive. As I pulled out my book, I fell to the floor and wept. I cried because it was my baby’s life story. I cried because of the pain it represents. I cried because I never thought I would see it in print. I remembered the nights I spent at home all alone reliving the life and death of my daughter. The work was relentless; the pain intense. I doubted and I retreated. Over and over God confirmed through His people, His Word and His peace that my story must be told. My sufferings were to be made known.

I’ve been preparing for this time for awhile now. But, just like your first year of teaching, nothing prepares you for a new and somewhat risky experience. Many obstacles, insecurities and fears have come my way. I have had to fight through each of them holding on to God and His promises. I was so encourage this weekend when our pastor spoke on 2 Timothy. Paul is in jail and writing to his friend Timothy encouraging him to persevere. The Message translates it as follows: “But I have no regrets. I couldn't be more sure of my ground—the One I've trusted in can take care of what he's trusted me to do right to the end.” (2 Timothy 1:12). Without a doubt, I would have regretted never writing this book. I would have also missed out on the opportunity to hear your beautiful responses to it. I am hoping and praying that it falls into the hands of those who need to desperately hear a word of encouragement and hope when faced with the loss of a dream. I will trust in my God to guard it and take it where it needs to be.

I so appreciate your support,
Beth